IwasaboutagaintoreverttotheprobabilityofaunionbetweenMr.RochesterandthebeautifulBlanche;butAdelecamein,andtheconversationwasturnedintoanotherchannel.Whenoncemorealone,IreviewedtheinformationIhadgot;lookedintomyheart,examineditsthoughtsandfeelings,andendeavouredtobringbackwithastricthandsuchashadbeenstrayingthroughimagination&39;sboundlessandtracklesswaste,intothesafefoldofcommonsenseBeautyMama.Arraignedatmyownbar,Memoryhavinggivenherevidenceofthehopes,wishes,sentimentsIhadbeencherishingsincelastnight--ofthegeneralstateofmindinwhichIhadindulgedfornearlyafortnightpast;Reasonhavingcomeforwardandtold,inherownquietwayaplain,unvarnishedtale,showinghowIhadrejectedthereal,andrabidlydevouredtheideal;--Ipronouncedjudgmenttothiseffect:-ThatagreaterfoolthanJaneEyrehadneverbreathedthebreathoflife;thatamorefantasticidiothadneversurfeitedherselfonsweetlies,andswallowedpoisonasifitwerenectarreenexcps.YOU,Isaid,afavouritewithMr.Rochester? YOUofimportancetohiminanyway?Go!yourfollysickensme.Andyouhavederivedpleasurefromoccasionaltokensofpreference--equivocaltokensshownbyagentlemanoffamilyandamanoftheworldtoadependentandanovice.Howdaredyou?Poorstupiddupe!--Couldnotevenself-interestmakeyouwiser?Yourepeatedtoyourselfthismorningthebriefsceneoflastnight?--Coveryourfaceandbeashamed!Hesaidsomethinginpraiseofyoureyes,didhe?Blindpuppy!Opentheirblearedlidsandlookonyourownaccursedsenselessness!Itdoesgoodtonowomantobeflatteredbyhersuperior,whocannotpossiblyintendtomarryher;anditismadnessinallwomentoletasecretlovekindlewithinthem,which,ifunreturnedandunknown,mustdevourthelifethatfeedsit;and,ifdiscoveredandrespondedto,mustlead,ignis-fatus-like,intomirywildswhencethereisnoextrication.Listen,then,JaneEyre,toyoursentence:tomorrow,placetheglassbeforeyou,anddrawinchalkyourownpicture,faithfully,withoutsofteningonedefect;omitnoharshline,smoothawaynodispleasingirregularity;writeunderit,&39;PortraitofaGoverness,disconnected,poor,andplainMeetingsandExhibitionsVenue .&39;Afterwards,takeapieceofsmoothivory--youhaveonepreparedinyourdrawing-box:takeyourpalette,mixyourfreshest,finest,clearesttints;chooseyourmostdelicatecamel-hairpencils;delineatecarefullytheloveliestfaceyoucanimagine;paintitinyoursoftestshadesandsweetestlines,accordingtothedescriptiongivenbyMrs.FairfaxofBlancheIngram;remembertheravenringlets,theorientaleye;--What!youreverttoMr.Rochesterasamodel!Order!Nosnivel!--nosentiment!--noregret!Iwillendureonlysenseandresolution.Recalltheaugustyetharmoniouslineaments,theGrecianneckandbust;lettheroundanddazzlingarmbevisible,andthedelicatehand;omitneitherdiamondringnorgoldbracelet;portrayfaithfullytheattire,aeriallaceandglisteningsatin,gracefulscarfandgoldenrose;callit&39;Blanche,anaccomplishedladyofrank.&39;
